WHAT I GOT FOR XMAS AKA MORE MAKEUP

PALETTE I BOUGHT BUT NEVER USED

JSC MINI BRAKER PALETTE LIQUID LIPSTICKS REVIEW

VLOG FROM BOSNIA

BUDAPEST VLOG | TOUR DE BALKAN SERIES 1/3

REVOLUTION MAKEUP UNBOXING!

Testovanie Nyx Ultimate Brights Paletky ♡

Rozhodne odporúčam pre všetkých, ktorí sa chcú pohrať s farbami.

SOLITAIRE

Do you ever get that feeling of daunting loneliness- even when standing in the crowd? As if you were just a wandering soul, no one really sees you or acknowledges you. You are just floating around like a balloon at which people look at for a slight second and then turn away and forget about it. Do you ever just find yourself observing other people who are not alone? As if you were trying to get the idea of how does a relationship work or maybe how to communicate with others.
Do you ever just find yourself laying in bed for days..not speaking to anyone  but your close family members. Slowly but surely backing away even from them. Closing your inner self and shutting them out.
Not on purpose though.
This is how I feel.
I am not pushing you away. I am just holding back in case you find me annoying. I am just holding back in case you decide you don't want me in your life anymore. I am not leaving you. I am protecting myself. You can always find me in my solitude quietly waiting for you. I am always here.
I am not the one who makes good conversations or good first impression. Don't look for that in me. I am shy and I am trying to figure out how to not look completely crazy. I am sorry I can't do better. I am a loner. And that's who I have always been and who I will always be. I walk my way alone and if you want to chat I will be more than happy, but I am sorry for not knowing how to make the first step.
Please don't judge us, solitaires. We are soft souls, too vulnerable to be fully opened to the world. We may be misunderstood, but that doesn't make us lunatics. Next time you notice a loner go ahead and try to make a small conversation. Be kind and loving- you don't even know how much it can change his/hers day. Use your power wisely.

VALENTINE'S DAY...

What did I leave in 2018?

Hello. This post is long overdue, but I still decided to write it. Just because. I can. 2018 was really intriguing, frankly I don't like looking back and I know that that makes me a hypocrite, but I need to vent- I need to let it go.
I would say 2018 was a rollercoaster. It ended up way lower than I expected It- if you get my metaphor. Having experienced so many heartbreaks, I can proudly say it had made me a stronger person, albeit it had destroyed the remaining pieces of my healthy authentic self. I had lost so much and when I realised it later this year, it brought me down to my knees. Feeling more than perplexed, I would even go as far as saying a little bit insane, I started my 2019 on a bad note. My resolutions and expectations paled into insignificance. I am sorry for saying all This, no one likes a negative girl, but this is the raw truth and my naked feelings .
I was being cheated on by the ones I loved the most. I was left alone by the ones I loved the most. I was betrayed by the ones I had gifted my time, heart and soul to. Having grasped for a little bit of air, like drowning Ophelia, I found myself at my wits end again when my mom was commited to hospital. She suffered a heart attack. Since then, nothing has been the same. She is no longer working, but fortunately, she is feeling a lot better and she seems happier than ever!
A lot of events in 2018 have changed my perspective on certain things and subsequently, led me to immense emptiness and solitude. All I long for now, is a little time to process things and to let go of these past demons and daunting memories. I wish me luck. And I wish you luck too.